When Your Child is Involved in Any Activity:
1.
Don't force your child to participate.
2.
If your child does participate, then be proud, and most of all -- be
there.
3.
Do listen for your child's desires, fears, and doubts -- and take
them seriously.
4.
Watch for behavior that says your child isn't having fun (acting out,
headaches, feigned illnesses, sleeping difficulties, performance
anxiety). Give your child permission to say, "No more."
5.
Remember that the activity is not about you -- it's about the child.
6.
Don't stake your ego or self-esteem on the outcome of the activity
or on your child's performance.
7.
Remember that activities for children should be designed mostly for
fun.
8.
Do insist that the activity be safely conducted. Take the time to
find out what "safe" means for that activity.
9.
Makes sure the activity is free of drugs, alcohol, tobacco -- or
sexual or gang-related activity.
10.
Do not yourself use drugs, alcohol or tobacco during the activity.
11.
Don't force others to accept your child into the activity, unless
there are extenuating circumstances and your child is both capable
and powerfully motivated to be accepted.
12.
Do teach your child to accept it when things don't go his/her way.
13.
Do not pressure your child to engage in age-inappropriate activities.
14.
Don't encourage, force or condone behavior from anyone (including
yourself) that's unhealthy, unsafe, or unfair.
15.
Do support, be proud of and praise your child -- regardless of the outcome of
the
activity or your child's performance.
16.
If your child isn't trying as hard as you'd like, gently try to find out why.
17.
Perhaps your child doesn't enjoy that particular activity anymore, and a
compromise can be found.
18.
Remember, life is short, and childhood even shorter. When in doubt, see #1
(Don't force your child to participate).
19.
Get involved. Learn what the activity is all about.
20.
Help with sets, organization, coaching, driving, snacks, safety, supplies,
promotion, etc. But leave the coaching, teaching and instruction to the
folks in
charge.
21.
Don't embarrass your child (make sure you KNOW what embarrasses your
child).
22.
Don't laugh at, ridicule, criticize, yell at, or abuse your child -- or someone
else's
child -- for making a mistake, performing poorly or losing a competition.
23.
Do teach your child to play (or work) by the rules and to resolve disagreements
without resorting to hostile, rude, abusive, mean or violent behavior. Make
sure
you do, too.
24.
Teach your child to treat everyone else involved in the activity with respect
and
goodwill -- regardless of race, creed, skin color, gender or ability. Make
sure
you do, too.
25.
Do teach your child to place the emotional and physical well-being of themselves
and other children ahead of personal desires to win or do well. Make
sure you
do, too.
26.
Do teach your child -- especially your younger children -- to value self-
improvement and effort (on their part and on the part of others).
27.
Teach them to take pleasure in small gains. And then make sure you do, too.
